Return of the son of the blurb

By Grace, I think this one is it.

blurb, definition:

A blurb is a short piece of writing that describes or summarizes something longer and more complicated. You might browse in the library, reading blurbs on the backs of books to help you choose what to check out. - vocabulary.com

I ventured into the depth of amazon, reading blurbs from other writers, trying to figure out a way to summarize even a fraction of what’s going on my book in a way that would appeal to the kind of reader who would appreciate it. In doing so, I realized something… The majority of blurbs aren’t really that good.

The blurb for George R.R. Martin’s first book in the ASOFAI series is about as dull as dishwater. If I picked up this book in a library or book store, I would never guess that it would be so compelling. It really just sounded like another medieval fantasy with lords and ladies and kings and forgettable names. All the authorities on fiction writing will tell you that a blurb is a make or break thing, but I’m not so sure.

On top of that, there was the realization that there was no traditional way that I could come up with to get the reader involved in what’s going on in Like Sunshine without giving away too many revelations prematurely, or going into a 500 word “what if?” kind of thing.

I was about to do a “WTF did I just read?” kind of blurb, before I realized that David Wong’s third John Dies at the End book kind of already has that title, and his blurbs look like that as well, not giving much of a synopsis, just warnings that you should definitely not read this book. I kind of love the idea, and wish I had thought of it first.

I even thought about a -Lovecraft-threw-up-on-a-history-and-mythology-text-book-and-Clive Barker-kicked-it-into-a-flaming-pile-of-old-pulp-fiction-books-and-bad-biker-movies-and-then-Robert Howard-shot-at-it-for-a-few-hours-while-Ed Abbey-roasted-a-rattlesnake-over-the-fire- kind of thing, but I think it only made sense to me.

But, it’s a love story, really. Didn’t start out that way. Started out as a book about nightmares. So, kind of like Dan Baird’s Album: Love Songs for the Hearing Impaired, this is kind like a love story for the mentally unstable… Or maybe just a love story for people like myself, who grew up reading Conan, but always thought it could use a bit more sex and violence.

Conversely, it’s also a bit of a “chosen one” story, but not really, so I was very apprehensive about saying that in the blurb. Movies have worn that one out so much lately, and I wouldn’t want to give the wrong impression. There is no “Mary-Sue” in this book, and I think that is what most people assume when they see “he/she is the key to everything/has great power he/she does not yet understand/ blah blah blah”, so that was a big ol’ no.

I finally decided to just be a big tease, and tell the reader what they would encounter, but give them no idea how any of it fit together. And, well, since I had the room, I introduced the title character, however briefly, and gave up the events of the first couple of chapters, hopefully without spoiling too much…

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Chance is a loser. Every good thing he ever held was ruined or ripped from his hands. Chance lost his family, his love, his life. Drifting on the fringe of a declining society he has come to loathe, plagued by horrific nightmares of torture and death, Chance is slowly losing his mind.

But Chance is in for a surprise, as one heroic act of suicidal selflessness will push him to the front line of a secret war that has raged since the dawn of humanity. There he’ll find heroes beyond imagination, enemies beyond comprehension, and a love so strong, that it just might save all of creation from being dragged into hell.

Like Sunshine is a tale like a trainwreck in reverse, as all the shattered, flaming, far-flung pieces come together, from its skull-splitting bloody beginning, to its unexpected triumphant climax. It’s a violent sexy ride full of broadswords, bikes, babes, guns, horrors, and heroes.

But beneath the gore, grit, and gutpuppets, it’s a story about sacrifice and redemption, about the value of the individual. Hope. It’s about hope and unity in a world fractured by petty tribalism and false righteousness. It’s about the never-ending struggle of everyone, that of Grace versus Chaos. So, it’s a love story, amigos, a twisted, naughty, sweet, silly, sarcastic, insane one, a heartfelt rollercoaster that rises and falls from stygian darkness to a warm soulful embrace that’s like… sunshine.

Ride. Shoot Straight. Speak True.

The End is the Beginning